Some Weeks, the System Is What Carries You

Maybe some of you noticed I haven’t posted in a while. (If you didn’t we can still be friends.)

Right after the one-year anniversary of my dad and my nephew’s passing in late June, we lost my father-in-law. The memories and flashes of going back to the same funeral home... again... were heavy. Our last few summers for my family have been heavy.

I’ve stared at a blank Substack article more times than I want to admit, cursor blinking at me, until I finally just closed my laptop, not knowing what to write. But I’m making myself show up today, because I know I’ll feel better once I do.

So here’s the value I can add right now… let’s talk about creating systems in your life, and why I think they matter more than almost anything else you can build as a creative.

Systems give us anchors when life feels like we’ve been tossed straight into the middle of The Odyssey — waves everywhere, no idea which way is up, Matt Damon somehow next to you in the chaos. They keep us focused on what actually matters. And they create a sense of calm. At least, they do for me.

I don’t think we need to over-systematize every single part of our lives. That’s its own trap. But having a general sense of what needs to be done — a rhythm you can lean on when you don’t have the energy to decide anything else — is genuinely one of the most helpful things you can build for yourself.

Think back to when you were younger. You showed up for school. Your teacher told you what you’d be studying that day, and you did it. You didn’t have to invent the plan every morning — the structure was already there, holding you up.

Essentially, when you build a system, you’re schooling yourself. Show up. Do the thing in front of you. Get one step closer to what you’re building. That’s it. That’s the whole engine.

Some weeks, the system is what carries you when nothing else can.

I’ll return in a bit.

Wishing you all a great rest of your summer.

Melissa

my son and FIL. 2023