Someone out there is waiting to find you
I had a call yesterday with a client who was worried that people would scroll past her content if they knew how old she was.
Can we just pause and think about that for a moment… because I think a lot of us have had that exact thought. Maybe not about age. Maybe about where we live, what we look like, how polished our photos are, or whether our life is “interesting enough.”
Here’s what what we talked about, and what I want you to think about today…
Your life experience IS the value you bring.
I’ve work with a lot of people over the years, who believe they have nothing interesting to share. That building a community requires some special story, some extraordinary credentials, some highlight-worthy life. And every single time, I want to gently shake them. (I promise I don’t actually shake them.)
Give me ten minutes in a conversation with you, and I will hand you a list of topics that people would genuinely want to hear you talk about. Every single time. Without fail.
Because there is one thing I’ve learned helping people build online… people don’t connect to content. They connect to humans. And everyone has something interesting to share.
We celebrate together. We grieve together. We learn, stumble, laugh, and feel… all of it together. And whoever you are, whatever season of life you’re in, there are people out there who are looking for someone exactly like you to connect with.
Permit me a little antidote of my own.
Back in the very, very early Instagram years… ancient history in social media terms… I was a young mom living in a state where I had no family nearby. My husband traveled frequently for work. I knew maybe a couple of neighbors. I was craving connection in that deep, way where you just want to have a conversation with someone who likes the same things you do.
So I started posting. About Jane Austen. About the romance novels I loved. Nothing fancy. Just me, sharing what I loved. Books and Jane. (Ok, and maybe and slightly unhealthy amount of Darcy memes.)
And through those little posts, I found two other moms… from completely different parts of the country… who also loved to read, each had one son (same as me and also of similar ages), and were also just looking for a fellow mom who loved to read to connect with.
Fast forward a decade. We have a group chat. We Facetime. We are, in every real sense of the word, friends.
That happened because I showed up. Online. As myself. Talking about books.
Now, I can’t be best friends with nearly 5,000 subscribers. But I do feel the connection here… you leave comments, you’ve supported me through grief, you’ve sent book recommendations that ended up on my bookshelves. We are a community. A real one.
So if you’ve been holding back… thinking you’re too old, too ordinary, too niche, too late… I need you to take one things away from this post.
Someone out there needs to find you.
Not a polished version of you. Not a younger version of you. Not a more-put-together, better-lit, more-credentials version of you.
You. Showing up. Sharing what you know and love and have lived through.
I get it, it’s scary. You are holding back because it feels vulnerable to put yourself out there. In the words of Anna from Frozen… and I say this with complete sincerity and zero irony — LET IT GO.
Be brave. Share yourself. Your people are out there, and they are scrolling right now, waiting to find someone they can actually connect with.
That someone is you.
I’d love to hear what’s been holding you back, or what happened when you finally showed up.
Happy reading,
Melissa
I love the book The Other Bennet Sister and am excited to watch the series. Would you be interested in me sharing a review once I watch it?
Mary, the bookish ugly duckling of Pride and Prejudice’s five Bennet sisters, emerges from the shadows and transforms into a desired woman with choices of her own.
What if Mary Bennet’s life took a different path from that laid out for her in Pride and Prejudice? What if the frustrated intellectual of the Bennet family, the marginalized middle daughter, the plain girl who takes refuge in her books, eventually found the fulfillment enjoyed by her prettier, more confident sisters? This is the plot of Janice Hadlow's The Other Bennet Sister, a debut novel with exactly the affection and authority to satisfy Jane Austen fans.
Ultimately, Mary’s journey is like that taken by every Austen heroine. She learns that she can only expect joy when she has accepted who she really is. She must throw off the false expectations and wrong ideas that have combined to obscure her true nature and prevented her from what makes her happy. Only when she undergoes this evolution does she have a chance at finding fulfillment; only then does she have the clarity to recognize her partner when he presents himself—and only at that moment is she genuinely worthy of love.
Mary’s destiny diverges from that of her sisters. It does not involve broad acres or landed gentry. But it does include a man; and, as in all Austen novels, Mary must decide whether he is the truly the one for her. In The Other Bennet Sister, Mary is a fully rounded character—complex, conflicted, and often uncertain; but also vulnerable, supremely sympathetic, and ultimately the protagonist of an uncommonly satisfying debut novel.
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"Your life experience IS the value you bring" I wish to holy heaven people in my age bracket believed this